Monday, July 14, 2008

I'm Mad at Michael Jordan.....

MJ was - arguably - the best basketball player ever to lace up a pair of high tops, certainly the best to put on some Air Jordans....

I still think Dr J would have given him a run in his hey day, though....

Most people are irritated at him for "retiring" and playing baseball. It was a good thing he kept his day job, he wasn't really very good at it. When he finally DID retire, a few folks were upset that he left.

Now he is "upper management" and sells underwear for a large garment maker.

THAT'S why I'm mad at MJ! You can throw Cuba Gooding Jr, into the mix, too!

I have always HATED boxer shorts. The most uncomfortable thing ever invented for a guy to wear (....well....ok.....a jock strap would be number one....)! They are always in the wrong places and form a ball in each pant leg.

We were forced to wear them in USMC Bootcamp. I think it's one of the ways they torture you into submission.....

I tell you, they were the first thing to hit the trash can when I left Parris Island!

Recently - 4 or 5 months ago, I decided to try those "Comfort Waist Band" new fangled knit boxer-briefs that MJ's commercial hawks.

Now THESE things were nice! Soft, comfortable waist band (just like they said....), and lightweight. They almost felt like NOTHING!

All was well in the world.....

Until.....

The very next time I wore the same pair. I couldn't believe it. Now, after being washed ONCE, what little elastic there was in the waistband and leg cuffs was USELESS. I felt like I was wearing one of those baggy pants that you see on teenagers these days.

Now, I also had the other two pair in the same condition.

WHY did I want to be like Mike? I should have just stayed with the old standby briefs that I was used to....

But NOOOOO.....I had to go back to the store and buy MORE knit boxer-briefs!

This time, though, they were made by the "fruit guys". These were actually MORE comfortable - came in better colors - AND didn't flop out of shape when they'd been washed!

I feel like sending a package to MJ and Cuba.....

....And I STILL think Dr J could of beat him one-on-one......

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