Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Little Did I Know...

I had to go into town today. It was an "emergency" run to the grocery store to pick up a certain spice the Head Chef needed for a dish she was making. I'm usually game for trying any new food she comes up with, so I dropped what I was doing (getting the barn ready for Mabel to calve), and headed on in.

I got to the grocery store (the only one in town), and found it to be a rather bustling place. I assume it was all those people doing a bit of "last minute" food shopping for the holiday this weekend. The placed wasn't PACKED, but it was busy.

As I made my way to the spices, I could hear a lady talking about how her son was coming home from college in Colorado (I guess it will be his first trip home since last MAY). Then there was another woman who was getting a few things so she could make a pie to take to her daughter's house in Lincoln on Saturday (the daughter has a REALLY small house and - if everyone shows up - somebody is gonna have to eat outside...).

A couple of people were talking about how they'd be glad when it all was over (and their kids went back home before they ate everything in sight).

Well, I just selected my spice, and headed up to check out and stood in line. There were two ladies just finishing up checking out (a mother-daughter tag team), a local beef farmer, and elderly man, myself, and another farmer behind me.

The mother-daughter team decided that AFTER they had paid would be a good time to check the list to see if they had forgotten anything, so the rest of us were in limbo.

All of a sudden, the daughter made a funny face and exclaimed "WHAT is that SMELL?"

At this point, everyone looked around, sniffed the air, and tried to identify what it was and - more importantly - WHERE IT WAS COMING FROM.

The farmer behind me pointed a finger at the cow guy and asked "Is that YOU, Bill?"

"Aw, (Heck), Mike, I had to run to town real quick, and threw on the muck boots from the barn, they must have some "mud" on 'em."

"Well, you shoulda known better, Bill. That smell is gonna kill us all."

A couple other people joined in the fray to give Bill a hard time about "eye's watering", "sinus's cleared out", and "I can't breathe". Bill couldn't wait to get out of dodge.

The Tag Team decided to clear out, Bill paid for his things, and the rest of us only had a couple items each, so we all were gone before the smell done kilt us.

I only had one other stop to make - my lovely wife needed a small calender for her office, so I headed for the discount dollar store.

Once inside, I quickly made my way to the calenders, and sorted through them to pick out one I knew Deb would like. From there, it was a short walk up to the cashier, where I found I was second in line to an elderly woman who was nearly finished.

I had managed to arrive in line just before two other people. As I stood there, waiting for the checker, I started thinking about the grocery store. I laughed to myself about poor old Bill, and the "mud" on his boots. The memory was so vivid, I could SWEAR I could even still smell that odor.

THAT'S when I heard it - the lady next in line made an awful face and said "WHAT is that SMELL"?

At that point, I was glad I only had one item and things were going along quickly.

I had to get MY boots out to fresh air, before the smell kilt ME....

Yup. Poor old Bill. He'll never know that he took all that embarrassment and ridicule for someones else's BS....er ...

Never mind.

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