I'VE BEEN STRAFED!

I SWEAR they do these type of things on purpose.....

Usually, I'm able to go about my business in the barn without having to hit the deck and fear for my life - usually.

This summer's hay harvest was a good one, more then we've had in the barn by a LONG shot. It's stacked floor to ceiling in there, and twice as deep, then any previous year. Of course, we have more hungry critters then normal, too. Since the hungriest of those critters are the two milk cows - and the "snooker" fence doesn't go to the end of the bales - they have a "hay" day when they come in for breakfast and supper.

On normal days, one heads for the stanchion (usually Daisy because she feels it's her "right" to go first....), and the other (usually Mabel because she is big, pregnant, and slow....), heads for a pan I have by the haystack. If said pan is empty, then the evil bovine will molest the hay stack. If it is full, then their face is occupied long enough to milk the other.

Since I have dried up Mabel, this works pretty well. I can feed both at the same time, and get done a lot faster. Of course, Mabel finishes before I do, so I need to run her back outside before she gets into the hay. She has that stack so afraid, I can almost see it shiver when she gets close.

No, REALLY.

This morning, I go out to chase Mabel out the front door of the barn, and I look up and see a couple bales MOVING. I finish getting the cow out the door and then go investigate.

THAT was my FIRST mistake....

By now the bale had quit shaking, so I was able to sneak up on it. I got right up to where my face was just about even with the bottom of the bale.

Second mistake...

Just as I got to where I could see good, the hen who was sitting behind the bale decided that she'd had enough and came SCREAMING out from her nest - heading right for my face. It was all I could do to get out of the way before I was eating feathers. I managed to grab at thin air - and the loose bale - and fell, flailing onto the floor.

To add insult to injury, the stupid hen RAN ME OVER on her way out of the barn!

There I was, laying on the floor in a heap of hay, with a bale on my chest, thinking about getting the name of the F-18 pilot who just tried to kill me. Talk about "shock and awe", I was definitely in shock, and I was saying awe "Shucks"...

I got to my feet, came to my senses, grabbed the bale and started to put it back to where it was.

That's when I remembered something about fighter pilots - they always have a Wingman.

I clambered up the stack, bale in tow, to find a good sized Americauna Rooster waiting for his turn at a sneak attack. Even though I saw him coming, it was still a little nerve wracking when he came flying at me.

I did manage to get the bale back where it belonged. I was also glad I got through the ordeal without needing to change any clothing, too.

From now on though, I plan on being armed with an anti "aircraft" weapon of some sort......